April Fools
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Turtle Underground
The great turtle or tortoise holding up the world is an ancient story from China and India — and the New World, whose original inhabitants came from Asia. Less well known is the race of giant tortoises who hold up New York City. Your engineer, the very definition of quotidian, will insist on schist —…
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Flushed Apps
What a fascinating life cycle! After their soft and spongy innards are consumed by female Homo sapiens, these indestructible exoskeleton-sheaths journey through the social network of the sewer system. (Males H. not so sapiens do sometimes use them, although judging from HRH Charles, Prince of Wales, only in a metaphoric sense.) Ubiquitous on our beaches,…
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Does This Komodo Make Me Look Fat?
There’s a giant monitor lizard on the loose at Atlantic Ave and Henry St. It’s about five feet long and looks hungry. I’ve called 911 and the ASPCA and the tabloids. Traffic snarled, people freaking out, dogs hiding. If you’re in the neighborhood, for God’s sake, stay indoors!
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Zoo-ology
The very rare and endangered North American Bare-Faced Feathered Cobra, Pseudobitis clementins, rarely stirs in its thicket at the Bronx Zoo. But it’s overnight escape into the wilds of Van Cortland Park has stirred something in this jaded city’s breast. A Facebook page and fueding Twitter accounts (@BareFacedCobra, @RealBareFaceCobra, @CobraAmI) allege to chart the animal’s…
Backyard and Beyond 